It has been a difficult few days for me and I am being brought face to face with my own demon, that deep voice that lingers and waits for vulnerability to come, before striking me in the rawest of places. I have tried many times to find expression for this, and here once more I throw words into the chasm, into the void, hopeful of receiving an echo of me.
rising up from the depths of my being to strangle me with all it's malevolence it seeks to wrestle from me any esteem that might have found a breath to choke life from any attempt at freedom insidious and charming all at once whispering gollum-like sweet nothings to my weary soul it calls me home to the dark pool of self loathing. that place where sinister comfort finds me wretched comfort old friend. torn from the heart of love i lie naked and ashamed sensing that escape is futile but hoping eternally for that release. dragged backwards at every step forward by tentacles that will not give respite hands reaching towards the light that never comes i will give in and release myself into the arms of that hate i will suffocate in my own doubt and drown in the melancholic undertow i will surrender to the gaping wound that binds me to myself i will give in i must give in but i will never give up