Poetics Night at dVerse and our guest host is Oloriel
Greetings to one and all! Oloriel here, tending the poetics and the bar tonight.
One of the topics that marked my previous year, and melted into the current one, is definitely the topic of home. I was born, bred, raised and still live in the suburbs. There is things and emotions you notice, that differ, at least for me, when I travel from my place to another. Over the years there has been images that etched themselves in my head as “suburban things”. Recently, I have begun noticing and exploring how it is so very similar in poetry. I discovered poems characterized as Suburban poetry, and it is what I would like us to attempt tonight.
What makes a poem into a suburban poem? I would not want to go on a limb and define it myself, nor use some strict formula or definition. I would say it is the feel that the poem leaves, the difference in scenery, the constant physical and metaphysical presence of animals, wilderness, gardens, curtains. Combinations that seem esoteric, worded that way, whilst in a modern poem they would be a normal thing.
dull yellow lampost light falls softly
onto the glimmering rain sodden pavement
alcohol noise broods heavy as the pubs empty
hands thrust deep into pockets
fighting the biting cold
sirens wail and menace looms
you scrunch as a discomforting feeling
knifes you between the shoulder blades
glancing behind there are only ghosts
it’s not comfortable here tonight
even the cats are nervy
dreams of bed and hot tea
whisper you homeward
it used to be fun
a night out in the city
“it used to be fun” – such a powerful sentence. Your poem had a very fast pacing rhythm and dichotomy, almost felt sweaty and riddled with fear. I really love how you created that atmosphere, it also makes me think how nowadays we don’t really enjoy anything, we just try and rush through it, to be done.
Thank You. More Urban than suburb but I enjoyed the prompt.
I liked the last two lines. They sum up my view of going downtown to Chicago.
Your urban thoughts, unfortunately, speak for the fact we are schooled in today’s world to be looking over our shoulder. Sad but true. I liked the phrase “even the cats are nervy”. Well, actually I liked it all!
The discomfort is very visible with the sirens and looming menace ~ I guess it depends on the company you keep Paul ~ But staying home warm and cosy is good for me too ~
There’s no place like home. Wish i had ruby slippers. A night on the town for us ends at 6:30 or 7:00 latest, (unless somebody’s in the ER). To me that’s a great picture of life progressing into the burb years; when you want to get away from the racket and go home. Thanks
This feels like going home in fear, not fun any longer. Maybe it was akways like that, but as we age we see.
quite chilling…no wonder “dreams of bed and hot tea / whisper you homeward”…i like the dark and grim image…
You’ve captured it so well, Paul, in the ‘ dull yellow lampost light’ that ‘ falls softly
onto the glimmering rain sodden pavement’ – only in the suburbs and the city – not where I live! No street lights and not a pavement to be seen – we walk the country lanes at our peril. But I remember the scene you have painted and it hasn’t changed much since I left.
I love the lines:
‘you scrunch as a discomforting feeling
knifes you between the shoulder blades’
and
‘even the cats are nervy’!
This is incredibly deep and chilling especially “dreams of bed and hot tea whisper you homeward” sigh.. beautifully done.
Visceral descriptions and feelings here. That uneasy queezie feeling in the dark shadows. Your last lines really wrap it up.
PS: late to the posting and reading on this prompt. Last week in Bermuda has me outside a lot! 😎
yes I agree with the sentiments…the cold and all…it used to be fun….got me too. Now I watch coronation street….oh dear…
a sad nostalgia to “it used to be fun”
You could say that. I actually really enjoy my nights out in the City but there are new elements that…well like you said…ain’t what they used to be.
Be careful walking home in the dark…hot tea is always a comfort.