dark matter

Flash 55 is my choice for Toads prompt this Saturday. I am late to submit, having lost my writing rhythm ( and commenting mojo)  through a combination of long distance travel, sleep disturbance and now a bout of depression/self-loathing/shame…not sure. Flat and low for sure.

I wasn’t going to post this. Then i was. Then i wasn’t. but now i am.

 

demystify the demise

of a once whole person

 

broken now as he is

into shards of little death

 

fucked by himself with

twisted barbs of truth

 

too real to swallow

too pointed to digest

 

how can it be so

when all was flowing

 

how can a fall be broken

when there is no ground left

 

21 responses to “dark matter

  1. Every person with a grain of intelligence must fall into periods of introspection and melancholy, even when the reason is not necessarily apparent. The sweat of living in this F-ed up world.

    Your poem has such a measured pace, and, yes, balance too. It spoke to me, so I am glad you decided to post it.

    • Thank You. I’ve experienced periods of this before but normally can spot it coming. Outta the blue this time. I have my balance back now and wanted to try pen the feeling prior.

  2. Paul, I feel your pain. I suffer from chronic depression myself. I too am finding it hard to get back into writing and cimmenting after taking care of my mother and her recent death. And this morning I recieve an email from someone I barely know which makes me doubt my worthiness as a human. Hopefully this break from dVerse will help us both get our writing and commenting mojo back. You have your lovely wife and drumming to help keep you centered. You have an incredible talent. Your prompt on blessings was inspired. Please take care of you.

  3. We can’t dance nonstop. We are human. Life catches up, and so do we. Sometimes, we must fall… let go… be mind-quiet… stop. And then, we come back to ourselves, muse replenished, pen and ink at the ready.

    P.S. Thanks for letting us glimpse your darker bits.

  4. Thanks for being real, Paul. We’re broken, we all fall and many suffer chronic difficulties. Hope you’re doing better…

  5. Understood, understood. Well done on the rhythm of it in these lines, and good on you for not backing away from how fucked it all is. I struggle to write when low, which is more of the time now than ever, dammit. Sending love!

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